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February 20, 2020

What would you give to turn an eye roll into a hug? Or an angry teen face into a smile? For me this is priceless and the reward for doing the hard work of untangling from my child. I grew up thinking that other people made me feel. And that anger, shame and uncertainty...

June 10, 2018

Thank you Aptos parent for sending in this challenging situation!

"At the end of the day when I'm tired, I'm just trying to get things done. Keep dinner, bath, and bed moving in the right direction. I am needing cooperation and calm. Instead my kids are fighting. I talk...

May 7, 2018

It was a rainy Sunday. I asked my girls, 5 and 7 to cooperate. I hadn't gotten a work out in days and felt congested with a sinus cold. My daughters started fighting over who got to go first in their game. I was trying to get lunch ready and my project finished. Next t...

March 16, 2017


I was teaching my Dad's class this week and was touched by their level of honesty and vulnerability.  One of the dads shared that he wasn't sure what he felt nor what his reaction was to trying out the new awareness tools.  

This experience was...

February 15, 2017

I'm finding these nuggets of clarity and understanding come through the strangest vehicles. This week it was... French Braids.

It was one of those, 'hard mornings'. Tension was high and tempers short. 6:45am rushing to get two teenagers out the door. I am still ma...

February 7, 2017

Yes, Jelly. Not where I was expecting to find wisdom, but there it is.

I am a stickler for not wasting food. So when my daughter opened a new jar of jelly, I yelled, "Don't waste that perfectly good Jelly! Don't open a new jar when we haven't finished the other one!!!!...

November 22, 2016

I know I'm in trouble when I 'need' to play Hay Day/Farm on my phone instead of the ten other pressing things on my to do list that I 'should' be doing. No motivation. Resistance. The silly game gives me the illusion of competence and control when I'm feeling out of co...

September 6, 2016

We have all been there. We think we are supposed to be calm and together so when things upset us we ‘manage’ our reactions to them. Your daughter rolls her eyes at you. Your son won't pick up after you've asked him 4 times. The printer won't work like you want it to in...

June 9, 2016

The Fear of Feeling Awkward

"Mom...this is so awkward!" We had friends staying with us from Colorado that we last saw 12 years ago when our girls were 2 and 4, and their girls were 3 and 6. Now they were all teenagers.

During dinner I got triggered when the Colorado girl...

May 5, 2016

 Working with Anger

 

My chest feels tight. I can’t get a deep breath. I feel like someone is sitting on my chest. 

 

I feel resentment. Anger. Righteous. 

 

My daughter just told me that she didn’t want me to use her phone to play a silly game, Hey Day. I saw red. After all...

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